Let’s get into this!
A little bit of background information on myself, if you are not already familiar with my blog is that I am an Autistic mother of an Autistic child.
And God knows I have been through the ringer.
But I think it gives me a little bit of an edge in understanding my child much better.
So I am very grateful for all life has given me and for the way everything turned out.
Though, the struggles are really real!
Autism
Autistic born people have a different neurological brain wiring.
Simply put, our brains work slightly differently.
We process things not in the same way as others tend to process stimulations.
Everything is just much more to us.
- Sounds,
- Lights,
- Textures,
- Smells and
- Taste
For example, something is very spicy to you but you continue to eat it because you like it. I for example cannot do that.
No matter how delicious the food is.
Because I feel my lips, my tongue, my throat and my stomach all burning.
And it is a feeling I cannot ignore or switch off.
I really cannot think of anything else till the feeling goes away.
Nor can I have a proper discussion because my brain will be focussed on this thing like chewing gum at the back of your shoe.
A more extreme example is that if you move a chair in your living room to another side of the room.
Any average joe will see the same room with a moved chair.
An Autistic person however, will see it all being ‘wrong’.
This wrong will be such an issue that they cannot get it our of their head.
Their whole surrounding becomes wrong.
That chair must be put back or it feels like they are in a room on Mars. And certainly they must be on another planet because who the hell would move a chair to the other side of the room and not put it back.
Its bloody criminal!
Anyway,
From a very early age my child was expressing a lot of the same characteristics and behaviours that I displayed when I was very young and I found a lot of similarities between us.
My husband also began to notice that our child was slightly differently special than the other children around us.
At the time, my sister had twins that were the exact same age as my child so I was also using that as a kind of point of reference.
No, I did not compare my child to them in everyway.
But there are general milestones that I realised my child was not hitting yet or hitting them much more differently than they were.
Anyway.
We decided to go down the long route of diagnosis.
And the diagnosis came back once my child was around 2 years old and some months.
It gave me hope.
Yes. Hope.
If you want to read more about what some common signs of Autism are at very early ages, you can find my posts here:
- Common signs of Autism in children from 0-18 Months old
- From 18-30 Months old
- And signs of Autism in 30-48 Month olds
The diagnosis meant that we could now apply for help for our child in terms of therapy and also in being able to get specialists involved.
And thus, the process of early intervention began!
Early intervention really helped my Autistic child being able to deal much better with sensory stimulations.
And once my child was able to process sensory stimuli much better and with less anxiety and stress. THEIR OWN life became much easier and happier.
Early intervention is EVERYTHING ya’ll.
Seeing my child making so much progress.
And being able to process much better.
And being less stressed out in general.
Absolutely made us think that they would absolutely be able to handle this road trip.
So,
Its not impossible.
Its not something crazy.
It’s not unheard off.
We have taken our Autistic child for 14+ hour road trips several times.
Several times.
- Does it take some extra planing?
Yes!
- And some extra equipment?
Yes!
- And the parental preparation of possible meltdowns?
Yes!
But it can be done!
And it can be done well!
The reason why we travelled by car across the country was because it was the safest and easiest means of travel at that time. That, and the fact that I had not seen my mother in a while as well as my nephew and nieces.
So we packed our bags and got ready.
First things first.
Absolutely take into account that your child is Autistic.
Prepare your child in advance
Autistic children tend not to be fans of surprises.
Of course, not all Autistic children are the same and I am sure that there are some out there who love surprises.
Most however, do not!
So tell your child your plans. Tell them why you are doing it this way and what the benefits of travelling by car is.
You can show them videos of other people going on road trips or you can borrow some books from the library of stories where other characters have gone on road trips.
Also explain to them in advance when you will be leaving. (Time, Date etc)
Remind them again the week before they will be going.
And it would be even better to have a countdown of days during that last week.
Have your child cross off each day on the calender.
Rembember, your attitude in front of your child is everything.
Staying positive about this trip and being excited about it will rub off on your child.
Especially if you are their anchor.
Disclaimer,
I do not think showing cartoons to your Autistic child will work well for this because the ‘road trips’ showcased in cartoons are usually very short and do not show reality really.
I mean real life, real events kind of videos to show your kid.
Have them involved in packing their bag
So I find this one really helps my Autistic child getting into the mindset of actually going.
And it makes it all very real for them.
Also, it makes them feel much more involved in the travelling as well as being somewhat in control of the situation.
Let your child know in advance what the temperatures will be like.
If there will be wind or if it might be sunny.
Tell them that you will also be travelling during the night time so maybe some pyjamas would be good.
If your child finds this overwhelming, you can always allow them to pick out clothes from between two or three options.
So you chose which clothing items would be best suitable for your child to bring considering all the factors and your child chooses one out of those options.
You can do this for every item of clothing.
The important thing is to just keep your child involved.
Otherwise, if your Autistic child is a little older you can write them a check list.
Include some items like trousers, pyjamas, vests, shirts etc and draw an empty box next to those items that your child can tick off once they have finished.
Snack Shopping
Take your Autistic child with you and ask them what they would like to snack on throughout the journey.
Get them involved in buying the drinks, the sandwiches, the snacks and whatever else you might want to eat on the journey.
That way, when the food is given out, your Autistic child is not overwhelmed and can absolutely enjoy eating what they chose in the store.
Give them categories:
- Healthy foods,
- Savory foods,
- Sweet foods
etc
Have them choose a little bit of each.
It actually makes it much more fun to do shopping this way!
And it was part of a food therapy program I did with my Autistic child, which encouraged them to eat much more as well as try new and different foods.
It was a long journey but so unbelievably worth it.
If you want to read about our food therapy journey you can click this link.
Comfort toy/teddy
If your Autistic child has a support stuffed bear, or a comfort toy that they take with them. Do not forget to bring this with you.
I cannot write much about this because stuffed toys actually freak me out.
And although I tried to provide the option to my child of having a stuffed bear, my child seems to not be bothered much about it.
They do have a crocrodile stuffed teddy in their bed, however, on occassion it has been in the wash and my Autistic child has asked about it while they are about to go to sleep. To which I told them that it is in the wash and my Autistic child went to sleep no problem.
It is there, but it doesn’t ruin anything if it isn’t there.
Another thing you can do is bring your childs favourite object.
Because that will be like carrying a little piece of home.
Something that reminds you of your safe space and your comfort area.
Equipment
Much like a freelance DJ, our Autistic children must bring with them their equipment.
As said earlier in this post, sensory stimuli can make or break an Autistic person.
Sitting in a car for prolonged periods of time, is not a simple task.
Sensory stimulations include:
- Hearing other cars and vehicles
- Hearing the talking amongst the other members in their own car
- Seeing everything going on outside the window. (road signs, cars, houses, trees, animals etc)
- Lack of movement to stim or tick
- Smells when you drive past farms, or someone in the car farts!
- Opening of windows and feeling the wind
- Feeling the need to pee
- Being hungry and/or eating and the smell that comes with it.
These are just some examples.
If you want to read more about how sensory stimulations affect Autistic children, I recommend you read this book which goes into great depth about the scientific research and explanations behind it all. It is called, Autism Spectrum Disorder: Neuromodulation, Neurofeedback, and Sensory Integration Approaches to Research and Treatment
Headphones
I have spoken about headphones previously. In a lot of my posts.
Headphones are amazing.
A holy grail if you will.
They can cut out a whole entire sensory stimulation. Hearing.
If your Autistic child, at any point begins to feel overwhelmed, headphones can really help them to feel better.
Especially in a car.
If the rest of the travellers like to listen to the radio, or have long meaningful discussions; and your Autistic child is not into that. Or does not like that, then them wearing headphones can put them in their own little world and allow for them to escape into whatever you are listening to.
While everyone else also get to enjoy the journey just as much.
So definitely bring your Autistic child their headphones and allow them to use them as freely and as often as they need.
Something to watch
Whether it be a tablet, or a phone, or an iPad.
Especially if it is a very long journey, then a 2 hour movie is a nice thing to escape into and enjoy.
It also distracts from all the other visual stimulations going on around your Autistic child.
So your child will have less of a chance of getting overwhelmed.
Make sure to have something/several things downloaded way in advance, have enough memory storage on the devices and also make sure to have a powerbank charger as well.
Things will definitely run out of charge. Powerbanks really are great inventions.
Disclaimer,
I like for my Autistic child to have everything like the above whenever we travel by car.
But I take issue with it if it is for the whole journey.
There are of course some Autistic children who absolutely cannot handle the journey and so need to escape into their own little personal bubble. Otherwise everything will become too much and they might end up having a meltdown.
However, I know my Autistic child is also capable of joining in on some of the road games, and also watching out for and counting windmills. Or looking at all the animals and naming them whenever we drive past any. And also counting how many airoplanes they see in the sky on the journey.
I believe in proportionate doses.
Sometimes my child needs to escape into their own little world, and other times they are calm enough to join us and their younger sibling with what is going on in the rest of the car.
Window Blockers
I do not know whether you are planning to sleep overnight at an BnB or whether you are banging out the whole journey in one go.
However, it is always a good idea to get something to cover up the window whenever your child has had enough of the outside and wants to shut off their visual stimuli.
There are excellent portable blackout shades that you can buy and place on the window of your child.
The reason I recommend these is because, if you are driving in the night time then it is very difficult to turn off lights.
Even if your own car is dark. There are always lights from the traffic lights. Or the headlights from other cars. Even lights coming out from houses you drive by. Or light coming from street lamps.
So portable blackout curtains can help remove those from the view of your Autistic child and can lead to a better nights sleep.
Which means a less groggy and moany child. Whether your child is Autistic or not!
I will add that being on the road makes it much more difficult for my Autistic child to fall asleep. My Autistic child will literally fight themselves to stay awake. So every little bit of help in getting them to sleep as peacefully and as deep as possible, can go a long way.
Taking Stops
I do want to add that if you are travelling cross country and your journey takes a very long time. AND you are the sole driver.
Please. Stop. To. Sleep.
It will do you no good to drive exhausted and it can cause severe accidents.
So, if you must stop at a BnB, prepare your Autistic child for that. Let them know in advance and show them where they will be staying online beforehand.
Tell them why it is important that you must stop to get some sleep.
Sleeping in a changed environment can be really risky with an Autistic child. Because you are supposed to get comfortable, in a strange place and surrounded by strangers who are only just next door.
The mental strain this can take on your child should not be underestimated.
And their ability to fall asleep, when it is on a strange bed can be severely impacted.
If you have the space for it, why not let them bring their own pillow?
You never know though. Some Autistic children generally do not mind. If they have been having sleep overs from a very young age, then staying in another place to sleep a little bit might not be so strange to them.
Anyway.
I hope you have the best of fun on your trip!
Certainly with a little bit of preparation, you absolutely can