My Personal Journey: Trying To Teach An Autistic Child to Write
I am so glad you are here because if you are reading this, it means you are probably on a similar journey to me – trying to teach an autistic child to write.
Let me start by saying, teaching your autistic child to write is not a sprint; it is a marathon.
And though it can be challenging at times, teaching your autistic child to write is also deeply rewarding.
An amazing book to read about how to even begin to start teaching your autistic child to write is, “Writing Made Easy for Children with Autism: Fine Motor Development” – The book uses visual aids, repetition, and a structured method to teach children letter recognition, phonics, and word formation.
Most Suitable Autistic Child To Write
Knowing when to teach your autistic child to write is when your autistic child shows an interest in shapes, letters, or drawing. These autistic children may naturally enjoy holding crayons, playing with writing tools, or trying to trace patterns.
If your autistic child often gravitates toward visual or tactile activities, it might be time to start to teach your autistic child to write.
Another good indicator to teach an autistic child to write is one who is already developing fine motor skills through play. If they can stack blocks, use toys with small pieces, or even hold a spoon steadily, they might have the foundational coordination needed to begin writing.
It is also worth noting that some children may communicate a desire to learn through non-verbal ways like pointing to books, watching others write, or imitating the motion of writing.
That said, the decision to start teaching should always be based on your child’s unique pace and needs. If your child is easily frustrated or overwhelmed by tasks requiring fine motor coordination, it might help to focus on building their confidence with simpler activities first, like using stamps, drawing lines, or practicing with stencils.
Why It is Good To Pre-Teach Your Autistic Child To Write
Pre-teaching school materials at home can make a big difference for in teaching your autistic child to write. My autistic child often thrives with routine and predictability, so being introduced to what they will be learning at school beforehand can ease their anxiety and boost their confidence.
This approach also helps them feel successful from the start, rather than overwhelmed or left behind.
Another reason to pre-teach your autistic child to write, is that they may need more time to process and understand new concepts compared to their peers.
By going over these ideas at home, they have the chance to take things at their own pace, ask questions, and explore the material in a comfortable setting.
Pre-teaching also allows parents to tailor the way the material is presented. Every autistic child has their own unique learning style – some are visual learners, while others might respond better to hands on activities or step by step verbal explanations.
At home, you can adapt lessons to match what works best for your child, giving them a better chance to fully grasp the material.
This can help build the self esteem of your autistic child to write more and a positive attitude toward learning, which are so important for their long term success.
Why I Decided to Teach My Autistic Child To Write at Home
For us, the decision to start teaching writing at home was not just about academics. My child is in a mainstream school, and while they genuinely love going to school, I noticed some cracks forming.
Writing was particularly hard for them. They would come home frustrated, not because they did not enjoy school, but because keeping up with their peers in this area felt overwhelming.
I could see their confidence taking a hit.
And that is when I decided I was not going to leave them to figure it out alone. School is important, but I know my child best.
I wanted to bridge the gap between what they were being taught and what they could confidently grasp at their own pace.
I believe that giving my child small wins at home could set the stage for bigger successes in the classroom.
So, I rolled up my sleeves and began researching how to teach writing in a way that felt accessible and empowering for my child.
Disclaimer
I understand you cannot fully protect your children from everything.
However, I can try to ease their struggles a little bit by making things familiar and easier for them to do in a group setting.
It is my job as a parent also to teach, and to help and to guide.
I do not think me teaching my child things that they will learn in the future in their classroom is keeping them in a bubble.
I see how happy my child is in school and I want to encourage this and try to keep it as happy for them as possible.
The Fine Motor Skill Hurdle
Writing is not just about learning letters; it is also about fine motor skills. Before I taught my autistic child to write they were struggling to hold a pencil correctly and it could even feel awkward or painful for them.
It was clear that we had to address these foundational skills first.
We started with toys that encouraged hand strength, like squeezing Play-Doh, threading beads onto strings, and playing with pegboards.
These activities did not feel like “work” to my child – they were just fun. But I could see the difference they made when it came time to hold a pencil for example.
There are plenty of games that you can do to teach your Autistic child to write from a very early age that will help to develop their fine motor skills also.
I have made another post some time back on the best type of toys that Autistic children can play with.
These toys can absolutely help with sensory development and fine motor skills.
You can read that post here: 22 Best Toys for Children with Autism.
Step by Step Approach
- Starting with the Alphabet
The first step was making the alphabet feel familiar. I filled their room with brightly colored alphabet stickers. Each letter had a fun, recognizable image next to it – “B” for a bumblebee, “C” for a cat.It was low pressure learning because the letters were always in their line of sight.
We also introduced alphabet stamps.
My child loved these! They would stamp out letters and shout out their names, and before I knew it, they started recognizing the shapes of the letters without needing prompts.
If you wish to try wall stickers, I recommend these, Animal Alphabet Peel & Stick ABC Stickers for Toddlers
These actually worked so well for that my child that I went and brought more stickers, such as the planets and the solar system, the world map and the periodic time table.
Honestly, I cannot express how much my child loves looking at them and reading them.
Get stickers with animals, or objects, or anything that your child already knows and recognizes.
That way they can begin associating words with pictures and can begin to link together in their brains the pronunciations and enunciation of the different letters of the alphabet.
2. Books and Bedtime Reading
Reading became a nightly ritual.
It was not just about exposing my child to letters and words – it was about bonding. My autistic child picks out the book, and we read it together, tracing the words with our fingers.
Over time, I noticed them beginning to recognize letters in the books and associating them with sounds.
Try to get a variety filled bookshelf with plenty of different types of books.
Help them chose a different book every night! I had to introduce a rotation because my autistic child would try to stick to the same book every night!
Also you. YES YOU! Reading in front of your children makes a huge difference.
If you are on your phone all the time in front of your children, do not be surprised if your child also want to be on their phones or devices instead of picking up a book.
Books make your child familiar with words and the alphabet and how things are written!
Also, make trips to the library with your children sometimes.
It really will be good for them to be around:
- Reading,
- Letters,
- Writing,
- The Alphabet and also to be around others who are strangers who also like to read and are reading.
3. Holding the Pencil
Teaching pencil grip felt like a milestone all its own. We used those rubber grips that slide onto pencils to guide their fingers.
At first, even this was tricky, but little by little, they got it.
Coloring books became a gateway. I would help my autistic child to write by helping them hold the pencil properly while filling in pictures, and eventually – on their own – their control improved enough to start tracing letters.
While playing and coloring in pictures, I try to keep reminding my autistic child about the correct way to hold whatever they will use to write with.
The foundation of writing is the proper way of holding the tools.
This way your wrist does not hurt, you have control over the pencil so the lines are smooth and also you do not damage the pencil or pen.
For example, when you teach your autistic child to write with a pencil, try to make sure that they know that the way they hold a pencil could make all the difference. If they hold their pencil in their hand in a fist, they can break the pencil, hurt your wrist and also have very little control.
It is important to practice holding writing tools between the thumb and index finger while it rests on your middle finger.
Teach your child to pick up their equipment using their thumb and their index finger and the tapping the length of the pencil against the part of your hand where the thumb and the index finger meet.
A great tip is using those rubber silicone things shaped like a triangle that you slide onto the pen or pencil you want to use.
This is also a shortcut way of getting to holding it properly because the fingers automatically shape around the triangle.
4. Tracing and Stencils
Tracing letters was where things really clicked. We used stencils at first, so they could feel the shape of each letter with their hand. Then, we moved to books with dotted letters they could trace.
The repetition built muscle memory, and it was amazing to see their confidence grow with each page.
This is the beginning step to actually start writing the alphabet.
I brought these stencils for my child from a Danish store called tiger and they work amazingly.
Holding the stencil to the paper. Trace the letters.
This gets a child familiar with how the letters in the alphabet are shaped and how to move their hand in that certain way to get the desired shape AND as a result, desired alphabet letter.
This is where you tell your autistic child to write all the letters of the alphabet using the stencil and show you at the end.
Not only does this ‘lack of supervision’ which they have not had so far when it comes to teaching your autistic child to write, it gives them independence but it also makes them want to it all to show you at the end.
My child gets extremely proud of themselves once they have completed the alphabet and rushes to bring me and show me.
That sense of self achievement without parental involvement is a great method to boost the confidence of the child also.
This will help them get more confident the more you encourage your autistic child to write.
You can also get stencils for the numbers separately. They have big stencils and small stencils.
I got them all!
Including stencils for the different shapes such as the triangle, square, circle etc.
My child really does enjoy making them all. And becomes very proud once they have done it.
5. Letter Tracing Independently
This step is what and how they teach in classrooms.
Using lines and dots and tracing.
To best teach my autistic child to write, I brought my Autistic child a book which has each individual letter and number, spread across 2 pages.
It is a very thick book, but so what!
The idea is that the first line of the page has the lines which you join to make the letter or number.
The second line of the first page of the book has slightly shorter lines that you join together for your autistic child to write out the number or letter.
And so and so on until you are tracing dots.
There are 2 lines on the page for dot tracing.
Then the dots on the lines become fainter and fainter and further apart.
An entire page however, is dedicated to your child writing out the number or letter completely independently, without any guide or help to copy or trace from.
The only thing that the children have to reference regarding size or placing of the letters or numbers are the lines that separate the spaces on each page.
Maybe less than 2 pages are needed for your autistic child to write a certain letter or number and some children need the person who is teaching them to write out some extra pages of the letters to learn.
6. Patience is Key
This part was just as much a lesson for me as it was for them. Some days were easier than others, and there were moments when frustration bubbled up for both of us.
But I kept reminding myself that this was a process, not a race. And my child’s victories – no matter how small – were worth every ounce of effort.
Patience is the name of the game!
Why It’s Worth It
The day my child wrote their name for the first time, I cried. It was not perfect, but it was theirs. Seeing the pride on their face made every frustrating moment, every tear, and every hour of practice worth it.
Writing is a skill they will carry for the rest of their life. It is not just about putting words on paper; it is about self expression and independence.
And knowing that I had a hand in helping them reach this milestone is something I will always cherish.
Once your child has figured out the shapes and designs of the numbers and the alphabet, they will not forget it.
Not a single person I have ever met has forgotten how to write after they were taught how to do it.
It is a skill for life.
Something that will be useful to your child for the rest of their lives and be of incomparable and unimaginable benefit.
So whether you are doing what I am doing and are trying to give your child a head start in school when it comes to these things, or you are homeschooling your child. Enjoy the process!
Make it fun, keep it light.
And try not to go intense in teaching your autistic child to write.
We want to encourage them and give them a passion for it.
Not make them hate it or dread it!
God knows this generation with all the technology and fast videos need all the encouragement they can get when it comes to writing and reading books!
If You Are on This Journey To Teach Your Autistic Child To Write
If you are trying to teach your autistic child to write, know that you are not alone. The road may be long, but it is filled with moments of joy and connection that make every step worthwhile.
Keep it fun, stay patient, and celebrate every tiny victory.
You have got this, and so does your child.