4 Tips for Shopping with an Autistic Child: Introduction
Welcome!
If you’re reading this, you’re likely looking for ways to make shopping with an autistic child a smoother experience.
I’m an autistic mom with an autistic child and a neuro-typical one, so I know all too well how tough it can be.
Why is Shopping with an Autistic Child So Challenging?
Stores have:
- Bright lights
- Loud noises and music
- Crowded aisles and unfamiliar people
- Various smells from products and food
These things can easily overwhelm the senses of autistic children.
It’s not just the lights and noises but the unpredictability that makes shopping with an autistic child so difficult.
My autistic child has a lot of sensory processing issues, which means they ca not always filter out sights, sounds, or smells like we can.
For example, the sudden sound of the loudspeaker, the glare of bright lights, or the strong scent of perfumes could be incredibly upsetting and overwhelming.
Here I will share some tips I use when shopping with my autistic child.
These strategies have helped me create a more manageable and even enjoyable shopping routine.
With these tips, I hope you can turn shopping with an autistic child from a stressful event into a positive experience for you also.
Tip 1: Give your Autistic child a Heads-Up before going shopping.
Whenever we go shopping with my autistic child, I give them plenty of warning.
I tell them the day before where we’re going, and I will remind them in the morning.
I name each store in advance, explaining where it is, what is inside, and what I plan to buy there.
This heads up allows my child to mentally prepare and reduces the shock of new surroundings.
Even if we are only heading to one or two stores, just the idea of change and movement can be overwhelming.
If your child can handle a visual checklist, make a mini schedule.
You might use images, words, or both, depending on your child’s preferences.
Visuals can serve as a gentle reminder throughout the trip.
When my child knows what to expect, the experience becomes easier. They know how many stops we’ll make, what we’re getting, and when we’ll be done.
This way, shopping with an autistic child becomes something they can understand and anticipate.
Also, shopping with an autistic child often works better if you start with smaller, shorter trips.
The idea is to ease them into it.
Start with one quick store visit, and when they become more comfortable, gradually add more.
This build up makes them feel safer with the process, and soon it becomes a routine rather than a random, stressful event.
Tip 2: Choose a Comfortable Mode of Transport
I have a post where I have posted on taking different types of transport methods with your Autistic children. That post is all about making going out positive and a happy experience for children with Autism. Read about that Here…
How you get to the store can impact the whole experience of shopping with an autistic child.
If it is a short walk, I let my child ride their bike or scooter.
If it is farther, I have a “mama bike” where my child can sit inside.
Both of these options my child loves.
For longer trips, we sometimes take the tram, which, again, my autistic child gets EXCITED for!!
Tips for Different Types of Transportation When Shopping with an Autistic Child:
- Walking: This works well if your child enjoys physical activity. Walking can also be grounding, giving them time to adjust before entering a sensory rich environment.
- Car Rides: I sometimes play my child’s favorite calming music in the car to ease them into the trip.
- Public Transport: If your child enjoys public transportation, it can add a positive element to the outing. Plus, there is a sense of adventure without needing to navigate crowds on foot right away.
Before leaving and on the way, I gently remind my child of the behaviors that I expect of them. Like staying close, using a quieter voice, and waiting patiently.
Making the trip itself something enjoyable helps.
You can incorporate rituals that calm your child down before entering the busy environment of a store.
Setting expectations and traveling in a way that suits them makes shopping with an autistic child easier for everyone.
Tip 3: Let Them Have Their Rituals
Allowing rituals is essential when shopping with an autistic child. My child has specific habits, for example, my child loves pushing a small cart, even if I’m pushing one too.
They feel involved, and it helps them focus on a specific task rather than the sensory chaos around them.
I let my child place items in the cart themselves.
They pick up the item, put it in, and even say “nicely, please,” while doing so.
It’s their way of making the process more orderly and predictable.
While it may look a bit unusual to others, these rituals make shopping with my autistic child much more manageable. For many autistic kids, like my own, rituals provide comfort and control.
These actions aren’t just quirky; they’re a way for my child to feel secure in an unpredictable environment.
Another ritual my child has is arranging the items on the conveyor belt at checkout. They love lining things up in a neat row and walking along with the moving belt.
It is a small act, but it provides a sense of control and focus.
Letting your child engage in these little tasks can ease their anxiety and make the overall experience much more enjoyable for both of you.
In my experience, when I allow these rituals, shopping with an autistic child becomes far less stressful.
My autistic child is absorbed in the activities, which means they are less likely to get overwhelmed by lights, sounds, or the general bustle of the store.
So, if your child has certain habits, try to work with them instead of against them. These rituals help my child feel a sense of control, and they allow us to get through the trip without too many hiccups.
Letting rituals play a role while shopping with an autistic child can ease their nerves and make the experience feel more comfortable because they can incorporate some kind of personalized routine into it.
Examples of Shopping Rituals That Can Help Calm an Autistic Child:
- Let them hold specific items, like a favorite snack or small toy they can focus on throughout the trip.
- Counting items as you put them in the cart—another repetitive, calming action.
- Letting them pay for one or two items themselves—it gives them a sense of importance and involvement.
Tip 4: Use Rewards and Praise
Give rewards and verbal praise and lots of acknowledgement to your child when a shopping trip goes well!
Positive reinforcement can make shopping with an autistic child more positive for both of you.
A small reward after a successful trip, such as choosing a snack item or a favorite toy, gives them something to work toward.
I have even found that a simple high five or verbal praise can boost my autistic child’s mood and cooperation.
You can also use a reward chart to mark each time they complete a part of the trip without issues.
Over time, the chart becomes a visual reminder of how well they are doing.
Positive reinforcement releases serotonin, the feel-good chemical, and creates a natural desire for kids to repeat the behavior that gets praise. This makes future trips easier too.
When we are shopping with my autistic child, rewards are more than just a treat; they’re encouragement. They reinforce the idea that trips to the store do not have to be overwhelming or frustrating
I recommend bringing a reward chart with you to the store. For each calm behavior, my child gets a ‘check’ mark, which they can later trade for a small reward.
It works as a form of behavior therapy, showing them that good behavior gets noticed and appreciated.
Rewards can be given in forms of whatever you choose.
When I feel my child starting to get frustrated, I gently remind them that they’ll get to choose a treat if they can stick to the routine.
This motivates them to focus on that reward instead of the frustration.
In the long term, this approach has helped my child develop patience and self-control, which makes shopping with an autistic child easier over time.
Otherwise, if you are struggling with budgets, you can give your child an option of two or three items and ask them to choose which one they would like.
Or, you can give them a budget and they can look around the store for something that is inside that budget.
Other Reward Ideas for Positive Behavior While Shopping with an Autistic Child:
- A favorite snack or drink once the trip is over.
- An activity or playtime at home as a reward for calm behavior.
- Picking out a small item from the store as a reward for completing the trip
Additional tips!
Tip 5: Create a calm down kit
A sensory kit can offer familiar items to help ground and calm your child if they start to feel overstimulated.
This kit might include noise-canceling headphones or earplugs to reduce noise, a small comfort item like a favorite stuffed animal, or a textured fidget toy to help them self-soothe.
My child responds much better when we place headphones over their ears.
My autistic child wants to stay involved and aware but prefers things to be quiet. And so the headphones really do help with that!
If your child responds well to certain scents, you might include a calming essential oil they can smell to help center them if they’re feeling overwhelmed.
A sensory kit, tailored to your child’s specific needs, not only makes shopping with an autistic child easier but also empowers them with tools to manage their environment.
Tip 6: Bring some snacks and drinks
Hunger or thirst can increase stress, so it is very helpful to have something for this on hand.
My autistic child can usually distract themselves with a snack, or become too engrossed in chewing or eating something to focus on all the extra stimulation that they might experience outside.
I find myself also preferring to chew on gum outside and inside the house. It really helps distract my brain and also somehow keeps things from being or becoming too intense.
It is really a strange thing but it works so well! Even for me, as an autistic adult.
Other Tips to Make Shopping with an Autistic Child Easier
- Time your trip wisely: Try to go when the store is less crowded to reduce over-stimulation. Morning hours or just before closing can be good options.
- Practice deep breathing and mindfulness: Teach your child simple breathing exercises they can use if they start to feel overwhelmed. Breathing exercises can work wonders when shopping with an autistic child.
- Stay calm yourself: Children often feed off your energy. If you stay calm and relaxed, it will help your child feel more at ease, even in a bustling environment.
A great book to read on what it means to have sensory processing disorders, which is something I believe all autistic individuals have, is this book, ‘Almost Autism: Recovering Children from Sensory Processing Disorder: A Reference for Parents and Practitioners‘.
There is really some insight on how to overcome it but also what it means to have such serious difficulty when it comes to understanding stimuli.
Final Thoughts on Shopping with an Autistic Child
Shopping with an autistic child is not always easy, but these strategies have helped us find some peace in the chaos.
Remember, it is okay to take breaks, let others stare if they must, and prioritize your child’s well being over everything else.
Shopping with an autistic child requires patience, preparation, and acceptance that some days may be tougher than others.
These small adjustments make a world of difference, and over time, shopping with an autistic child becomes less about stress and more about shared time and experiences.
I try to absolutely embrace the good moments, learn from the hard ones, and always remember you and I are doing an incredible job.
With these tips, I hope your experiences of shopping with an autistic child can become a little smoother, a little easier, and a little brighter each time.